Mini Reviews - Tron: Legacy

Tron Legacy

Sam Flynn (GARRETT HEDLUND), the tech-savvy 27-year-old son of Kevin Flynn (JEFF BRIDGES), looks into his father's disappearance and finds himself pulled into the digital world of Tron where his father has been living for 25 years. Along with Kevin's loyal confidant Quorra (OLIVIA WILDE), father and son embark on a life-and-death journey of escape across a visually-stunning cyber universe that has become far more advanced and exceedingly dangerous.

From the first time we set our eyes on the gorgeous teaser, we were blown away that the sequel to Tron is finally happening after 20 years. Now 2 years later and the film is now here, is the wait really worth it? Probably not. The problems that were addressed in the original Tron film is still applied in this: the lack of interesting and engaging story, not many cool characters and the terribly slow pacing. And despite the film is ACTUALLY named after the hero character in the first film, that character has been brought onto the sideline and doesn't get that much screen-time. The visuals are very pleasing to the eye, the action sequences are pretty cool and the score by Daft Punk kept the film rolling, saving it from becoming that stinker of a movie. Like Avatar, its a nice and pretty firework show, but its very hallow, empty and unfortunately boring for the majority of the film.

2 and a half out of 5 stars

The Social Network Full Review

Status: "Like" this movie

Nearly everyone laughed at the idea of making a movie about Facebook. As if people are running out of ideas to tell a story and come up with something ridiculous like a movie about the board games Battleships and Monopoly or about a computer simulations game, The Sims. We all thought it was going to be something wacky involving Facebook when in fact, we were all wrong. Helmed by David Fincher and written (beautifully) by Aaron Sorkin (not to mention composed by Trent Reznor of Nine Inch Nails), we later found out it was about the creation of Facebook, that extremely addictive digital time-waster that has gotten nearly everyone in the entire planet hooked into. And with this combination of talents, who knew that a movie about Facebook would be so interesting, compelling and riveting, if not a little bit exaggerated.

The Social Network (aka Getting Screwed: The True Story) begins with a breakup between young Mark Zuckerberg, soon-to-be founder of Facebook (Jesse Eisenberg) and his ex. Fueled with rage and alcohol, Mark creates a web page, along with best friend Eduardo (the new Spiderman, Andrew Garfield) that allows guys to choose between various female Harvard students in terms of hotness and thus crashing the entire Harvard’s network. This grabs the attention of high-class Harvard students, the Winklevoss twins (played by just one guy, Armie Hammer) in proposing to Mark in programming their website. Although Mark closes himself off from the twins to create his own social network venture which would become “Facebook” and thus follows the backstabbing, the screwing-overs and the courtroom dramas for this one single idea.

This is the one tiny problem I had with the film and it made the film just a shy away from being an extremely great film for me. When it comes to adapting a true event into a feature film, there is always a chance where the story will be more exaggerated, elaborate, operatic and dramatic ala A Beautiful Mind and Shine. And it’s no big deal because you have to make the story very interesting and exciting for the audience. You can’t watch a boring film, I suppose. But with all the drama the film produced throughout, to me it just lost its impact towards the end and you can realize that there was no sense of peril, risk or endangerment. That it all works out in the end, which makes all the drama the film had not pointless, but an insy winsy tiny bit. That said, it all just kinda summed by just one quote, making me realized how romanticized the film really is. Said by the female lawyer in Mark’s defence, “To you, it’s just a speeding ticket.”

Not to say the film is bad, in fact it is still amazing. What I highly praised about this film are the performances by the actors and the always sharp-witty writing of Aaron Sorkin. His writing is always that fun and sharp especially in his last project, Charlie Wilson’s War and his writings are greatly delivered by the performances of the actors especially Jesse Eisenberg as the complete assh*le you can’t help but adore. Jesse just steals the show with his nose-raising superiority ego and his ability to give such great comebacks with complete ownage. Andrew Garfield really hold it together and you really do feel sympathetic for him as the only good friend of Mark, as he is doing everything for him and to make his business work only to have him screwed. Justin Timberlake is now placing himself among the rare list of great music-artists turned great actors as he proved himself to just wow us over and over.

For a movie with a not-so-interesting subject like Facebook, this is kind of a must-see. There are great performances from the cast especially Jesse and Justin and the writing will keep you hanging for every great bits, not to mention it is also so damn funny. Though you'll find that the film is made something that is small very much exaggerated, you will be thankful that the great performances, the writing, the camera direction and the music came into play otherwise it would have such a hacked attempt. Add this to your Facebook's friends.

4 out of 5 stars

Mini Reviews - The Last Airbender

The Last Airbender

Based on the hugely successful Nickelodeon animated TV series, the live-action feature film is set in a world where human civilization is divided into four nations: Water, Earth, Air and Fire.

Even though I'm not a fan of the animated series, I have seen some episodes of the show and it is brilliant and had so much going in it. That said, the film really did sucked. But I'll just say that the film is terrible, but it is not THE worst film this year. But boy, Shyamalan sucks really hard in this one. The problem with this film is that when the mythology and concept of the series is about martial arts with elemental bending skills (which is a badass concept), M. Night goes out of the way to make the film so much boring and dull with so little action and spectacles thus turning it into another bad Harry Potter knock-off. There is some nice story going on, but the narrative goes at a giant snail-pace and all the characters have to be melo-dramatic about everything. Not much we see Aang(the main character) get captured again and again and always slips away from badguys when they are NOT looking at the time! And there are so many pointless setups and buildups to everything that is so not rewarding to the audience. Shyamalan... maybe just stop making films for 5 years and take a loooong vacations, because your losing streak in films are getting worse and worse. But I'll give you a compliment...

Since this is not called "Avatar: The Last Airbender" like how it is originally called because James Cameron used it for his film, I'll say this:

The Last Airbender is a very terrible movie, but I don't hate it.

Avatar is a better made movie, yet I have SO MUCH hatred for it.

Shyamalan is spared from my pure fiery hatred.... for now...


1 and a half out of 5 stars

Mini Reviews - Charlie Wilson's War

Charlie Wilson's War

Charlie Wilson was a bachelor congressman from Texas who had a habit of showing up in hot tubs with strippers and cocaine. His "Good Time Charlie" exterior, however, masked an extraordinary mind, a deep sense of patriotism and a passion for the underdog, and in the early 1980s the underdog was Afghanistan-which had just been brutally invaded by the Russians.

Its a very well written and greatly performed film about the event that will end up biting on America's ass. What is really charming about this film is that it doesn't play it too serious and overly dramatic as it is provided by the humor and dialogue that keeps the film momentum really going. Even the ending has some little humor to it. Tom, Julia and Phillip are Oscar-winners and they showed how much of great actors they really are. Check it out.

4 out of 5 stars

Great Black Swan Posters

Its not a movie review or a long blog post, but these came to my attention especially I'm so looking forward to Darren Aronofsky's next art film, Black Swan. And if you haven't guessed it yet, it is a movie about ballerinas. Thats right, ballerinas! How could a straight-up guy like me take interest in a movie about ballerinas? Only a genius who brought you Requiem For A Dream and The Wrestler can make me that.

Along the way, the film brought us some brilliant classic posters. And I do mean "classic", as these designs and graphic really hawks back to the operatic ballet posters you see in front of an opera house. The use of abstract shapes and simplistic design does shout out elegance and epicness. Especially the typography gives a sense you are about to see a grand scale ballet play other than a film. Check these out, my favorite is the second one.





And if you really want to know what the movie is about, check out the trailer. It is just freaky.

Mini Reviews - How to Train Your Dragon

How to Train Your Dragon

Meet Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, heir of the Viking chiefdom, but a boy with one very big problem: a hero he is not. "How to Train Your Dragon" is the riotous story of Hiccup's quest to hunt down the fiercest dragon, bring it into submission, and-hopefully-pass his initiation. Instead, he ends up... read more Meet Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, heir of the Viking chiefdom, but a boy with one very big problem: a hero he is not. "How to Train Your Dragon" is the riotous story of Hiccup's quest to hunt down the fiercest dragon, bring it into submission, and-hopefully-pass his initiation. Instead, he ends up with the smallest, most ornery dragon - it's even toothless! Thus begins the hijinx of the world's most lovable, unlikely hero and a most reluctant "beast."

A surprisingly, sweeping and lush animated film of a boy and his pet dragon, especially coming from Dreamworks who are now learning a thing or two from Pixar. Even though I would complain about Jay Barucehl's annoying nasel voice and the not-so-subtle scene translation from humorous to sweeping epic, I still had fun with the imaginative designs on characters and dragons, the great orchestral score, good voice performance (san Jay Baruchel) and the thoughtful and well-written story. And its kinda funny that all the Viking kids sound very teen American while the adults sound stone-cold Scottish. Viking girls really do drop their balls.

4 out of 5 stars


P.S - Toy Story 3 is still better

Mini Reviews - The Other Guys

The Other Guys

Two mismatched New York City detectives seize an opportunity to step up like the city's top cops whom they idolize -- only things don't quite go as planned.

For the look of the poster and even trailer, you'll think it'll be an all-out action-comedy especially from the likes of director Adam McKay. Sadly the only time you'll get that is when you see both Samuel L Jackson and The Rock having a crazy action scene at the beginning of the film. There are a few chuckles and laughs, though jokes do get reused by the last half of the film and it gets tiresome. And there is nothing to actually care for with any of the characters or anything and you don't get much of this film. Its not bad and Mark Wahlberg proved to be funny alongside with Will Ferrell. Eva Mendes is hot, but her whole reason to be in the film is to be hot. And its nice to see Michael Keaton after a long while. Its not terrible, but its not great either.

2 out of 5 stars

My Top Ten: Most Pretentious Films I've Ever Seen

Its that time of the month where I give my Top Ten on ANYTHING!

In this day and age, we all wanted a different and intelligent film from the sea of dumb-down mindless films Hollywood brings out. But sometimes the sense of intelligence can bite you in the ass by having directors making films TOO smart of their own good. Films that try TOO hard to be different and meaningful and probably can only be appreciative by the pompous and hipsters (I'm looking at you, Armond White...). So here are the top 10 list of the films that tried to be too smart and not in a very good way.


NOTE 1: I’ll give you the honorable mentions of other pretentious films that aren’t part of the Top Ten.

Rachel Getting Married
The Fountain
Shortbus
I’m Not There
Synecdoche, New York
The Gentlemen Broncos


NOTE 2: To cover about The Matrix Trilogy, I’ll say about this:

1 – While the Matrix has that pseudo-intellect philosophy, it really did have a good story and mythology. Also it makes up for great action,

And 2 – The Matrix Revolutions isn’t pretentious. It just sucks.


Lets get on it shall we?

10.
ACROSS THE UNIVERSE



This could have been a very nice film with nice visuals, accompanied by the soundtracks of The Beatles. Yet you can sense that its trying to be epic and more meaningful when everything else just falls flat. The story goes nowhere, characters inexplicably go in and out, sense of repetition and all that it just relies on EVERY song by the Beatles. Like the movie is saying "We don't need the important stuffs like story and character development. The Beatles = critical acclaim." Just because you have the Beatles as your soundtrack doesn't mean it'll be a good film. And its not even helping when all the singers give such lame covers for each Beatles song.


9.
DEATH PROOF



Hey, I love Quentin Tarantino and he is still highly regarded as a filmmaking icon. But he can really go off the rail when displaying his own talent and knowledge. Yes, I know you do great writing. Yes I know you know SO MUCH about movies! Get on with the freakin movie! He showed a little bit in Kill Bill Part II, but his pretentiousness went even further in this. Just disregarding the entire subject about making an exploitation film (The compilation is called GRINDHOUSE! Rodriguez had the right idea and this didn't), it was nothing more than a total display of his writing, which is only great for about ten minute before I get really bored. Sure enough the car chase at the end was great, but I had to go through so much dribble for that?!

8.
HULK

As a comic-book superhero film, this is VERY pretentious. Its VERY pretentious when you try to make an intellectual film about a superhero that does nothing but smash stuffs like The Hulk. That can work with other superheroes especially Batman, but not The Hulk. It is weird that I look for films that are ambitious and this is the one kind of film that should not try be ambitious. Well ok, it can be ambitious enough, but not TOO ambitious like this film tried to be. It was too emotional, too dramatic, even too artsy for a Hulk film. I'm a fan of Ang Lee, but this is something he should not try to have his hands on it.

7.
LADY IN THE WATER

Its pretty pretentious when you think a bedtime story you once told to your kids would turn into a good film. Even more if you have yourself in the film and present yourself as the most important character. With an added bonus that you have a "critic" character getting killed off. Surely this film is really a bedtime story... it really put me to sleep of BOREDOM! The film is way too slow and way too convoluted and ridiculous to have your head around. Sadly this is one of first signs of the M. Night Shaylaman's downfall. Poor guy...

6.
GHOST IN THE SHELL 2: INNOCENCE

The first Ghost In The Shell was truly an animated marvel, incorporating both the right amount of intelligence and action in a nice animated package. And it could have been a one-time thing, but the audience kinda wanted a sequel. So we had both the manga and the well-written TV series “Stand Alone Complex” to keep our interest in the Ghost In The Shell series. Then when the sequel came out, it was completely meh and forgettable. Inserted in are ridiculous amount of philosophy and dead air with nothing much to go for like action or visuals. The first film had the right balance, but this really tipped offside.

5.
DROWNING BY NUMBERS

I saw this in one of my film masters class and I could count the many times I rolled my eyes over. Others would see this as a work of art when I see it as a pompous waste of time. What do you have in this film: characters you don’t really care about, overly-done artsy smartsy narrative/filmmaking, too much intellectual references that are not even fun and that ONE ANNOYING thick-glassed nerdy kid that I just wanted to beat the living crap out of by myself. No wonder he is such a loner and always hang out with older people. Normal kids would get annoyed by him and want to beat him up. I don’t blame them.


4.
BABEL

In the season of Oscars, films would try to be smart by having that “multi-cultural crossing-over lives-clashing” narrative. Crash comes close, but this really takes the cake. At first sight, you’ll think it is a well-made film with a controversial subject. I certainly did so until I look back at it again and realize that it really tried too hard to be smart. As if it was trying to be daring and oh so controversial by having so much sexual and violent scenes especially with one scene involving a horny kid. That made me go “What was the point of that?”And in the end, you end up not caring about any of the characters or the story or even the message behind the film and realize that this film just wanted an Oscar.

3.
PALINDROMES

Yeaaaaaahhh, Todd Solondz is really messed up. Just by looking at him will make you understand why he makes messed up films. Even though I heard some of his films were pretty good, I picked out this film as my first film of his. Bad choice! Now I always end having that bad taste in my mouth every time I get mentioned of Todd Solondz. Including intense subjects like pedophilia, child sex, abortion and crazed religion is kinda dandy until you realize that there is no absolute point of this film. And I'm really that kind of guy that looks forward to messed up movies, but looking at these subjects without a hint of interest or fascination and just being plain disgusting made me wish I never heard of this guy, Todd.

2.
SOUTHLAND TALES

Ok, I'll say this. I LOVE Donnie Darko. Certainly not part of my all-time favorites, but I really do love the film. It was artistic, subtle and meaningful with some great performances. But some people say that the director Richard Kelly was pretentious by making Donnie Darko, to which I reply I disagree. Richard Kelly became SOOOOO pretentious when he made this insanely philosophical artsy smartsy bullsh*t of a film, Southland Tales. He really did made sure that he had all of the ingredients to make a standard pretentious film. 1. Convoluted storyline that tries to be epic, but we don't care at all. 2. Nice, but pointless visuals/images that tries too hard to be symbolic and metaphorical. 3. Too many F*CKIN WEIRD casting! I would be impressed by actors doing something completely different if it was subtle. There is NOTHING subtle for any of the actors and it was done for the sake of being weird. Am I supposed to be fascinated by every single weird and ironic characters that pops up onscreen?! 4. Tries to have a superficial intelligent story/message which really doesn't mean anything in the end. By the time this film finished, I went "Reaaallly Richard Kelly..... REALLY?!"


And my number 1 is...

1.
WAKING LIFE

Like that style of rotoscoping animation, but this film is a GIGANTIC waste of my precious time! How is this actually a film? A film, by my definition, is a series of images that interconnects through with characters, story, narrative and meaning. This doesn't have a story! Or character development! Or a hint of plot! Or any actual point besides from any bullsh*t philosophical discussion the film has. That is what this "film" was. Just a series of scenes with people discussing philosophy. Nothing more! No connection or reason to any of it. It just only use rotoscoping animation to make up for any lack of interest or actual content. PLEASE, if I want philosophy, I would wear a turtle-neck sweater and go to a university lecture class. I'm sorry, but to me, the celluloid and tape could have been used for a film with a much better story and meaning. Instead they were used on this drabble pretentious crap. If there was ANYTHING that would define pretentious, it would be this film!

So that is my top 10 list. What's your opinion?

Mini Reviews - [REC] 2

[Rec] 2

The action continues from [Rec], with the medical officer and a SWAT team outfitted with video cameras are sent into the sealed off apartment to control the situation.

A well-thoughtful and tightly-expanded continuation to the revolutionary hand-held scare-fest. I would admit that the idea of supernatural leap from the first to the next film will kind of throw people off, but no matters as it still provides a damn thrilling ride. Having part of the film focus on the SWAT team can make the narrative a little terrifying as they are more protected and armed and the additional focus on a group of mischievous kids proven to be sometimes pointless in the film. Other than that, it is a worthy sequel to the REC saga.

3 and a half out of 5 stars

I'm now 24... kind of a biggie..

Well in between last year and now, it really has been an emotional and eventful ride with so many changes and phases with many life lessons learned. I have experienced some of the lowest lows in my life while getting over so much hurdles to finally get back on my highest. The past year had forced me to actually do some heavy soul-searching and it is still ongoing. And I wouldn't have go through this with the help of my friends, old and new and good and ex. Its funny that some parts of the past year actually mimics the entire movie of 500 Days of Summer. And now I'm at that point where possibly everything will change for me.

Anyway there is not much to be said except I did have the MOST interesting birthday I had in my life... so far. Its a very funny thing and I'll probably remember this birthday more than most birthdays I had. I will hope that this coming year will be more memorable as the last one and I would like to thanks to all my friends and family who have support and encourage me throughout my life.

The Expendables Full Review

Some people have waited their entire life for mix-ups or team-ups of certain action stars. The best one I could think of was The Forbidden Kingdom where Jackie Chan and Jet Li have a spectacular fight and later team up to fight against the bad-guys in an awesome way. So we were hoping to see Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger take on the epic giant massive army force in a wasteland and that idea alone will make the whole planet Earth explode. Well... that day has finally come! Its just that you'll see those three guys in one room, doing nothing and Schwarzenegger is only in the movie less than 3 minutes. That is probably the closest thing you'll get to see these three biggest action stars in one room in a movie.

So instead, you'll see other action icons like Jet Li, Jason Statham, Terry Crews, Dolph Lundgren and Mickey Rourke filling in on some explosive testosterone goodness. But unfortunately, they don't really do much until the huge final explosive guns-fest and it has been pretty much the Stallone/Statham show for the majority of the film. We don't really spend that much with the other characters like Crews, Couture or even Li since the entire focus and development are with Stallone and Statham. So the other guys are there and its great to see them blow up stuff, but I wouldn't care as much for what they do in the film.

We are F*CKIN MEN!!!

Here is the plotline: you have this group of bad-ass mercenaries called "The Expendables" that specialized on dangerous and crazy missions. Then Willis and Schwarzenegger ask Stallone if he can take out an evil American agent controlling a giant militarized island country. And... that's it. This movie wasn't really made to have a plot or any depth. People will come to see stuff blow up and men with giant muscles shoot machine guns (that sounds a little bit gay). And you can come to predict how the movie goes and there isn't any huge stakes or dangers for the Expendables especially for ONE that really came back from the dead! This film also goes by 80s movie action logic, but there are even some bits that were such long stretches. It just becomes too silly.

And here ya go, a cute little pink fairy... very manly

So yeah this film was kind of a let down for me especially since I'm that kid that grew up watching those classic 80s-90s films. I watched Total Recall, Terminator, Die Hard (thats more of a thinking man's action film), Rambo and Predator over and over again when I was like ten on that rusty old VHS machine. And I was kinda looking forward to this film since I have been liking what Stallone have been directing since he got back on the director's chair. Rocky Balboa was a brilliant end to the series, but the 4th Rambo movie "RAMBO" was f*ckin hardcore! To me, that film (Rambo) was really the return of 80s action movie. The plot was simple and thin, but the payoff and climax was massive and completely satisfying with enough character development.

However this film, The Expendables was pretty much a step back. I would understand if they cut down on the gore and make it accessible to a much wider audience. But there were spots of heavy gore from the beginning and a little afterward we don't get that much. So its either go all out and be f*ckin crazy or have none at all. The best example of this is Crank: High Voltage where the film knows its f*ckin crazy and stupid, doesn't give a cr*p about logic, has no shame in having violence, gore, nudity and a horse c*ck and guarantees you a great and fun time. That film has a giant pair of balls and this film isn't close to that. And the other thing in this film that really annoyed me is the amount of CG blood. It doesn't work for 300, not for Ninja Assassin and not for ANY movie especially this! It makes the entire film clean and sterile and loses any impact on violence. There were some kills that could have been awesome if it didn't have CG blood!

I TOLD YOU, I don't know how to play basketball!

Its nice to look back on the 80s action movies, but there are reasons why action movies evolved to where are they now. Die Hard could be the start of that since its about an un-expecting out-of-luck man who is risen up to the challenge. And since then, we see other people that are not of muscle-physique jocks becoming action heroes because its much more interesting and challenging. The Expendables is a nice look back at the decade that was and it gets to think of why we love it and why we're not interested in them anymore.

2 out of 5 stars

Machete will be much better...

Vampires Suck Full Review

Oh Dead Lord...

(If you ask me how I saw the movie, I downloaded it off the net. I didn't spend any money on this travesty of the film.)



I really don't know what possess me to do this. What makes me go in and watch really bad movies. I have checked out Troll 2, Bratz, freakin Twilight movies and even (God forbid) Disaster Movie. Maybe by watching these bad movies would give me some sense of accomplishment and credibility, which later question myself: is it worth it anymore? Am I getting tired of sacrificing my brain cells every time a crappy movie pops up on the horizon? Does it give me a sense of adventure and danger whenever I gave my eyes upon it? This movie challenges my perception. Now honestly when I heard that these two idiots had a new movie called Vampires Suck, I was about to get my guns out and go on a blind murderous rampage. But I refrained myself because I got into so much trouble from the last time I did that for Disaster Movie. And low and behold...



This movie COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY sucks...



I still ended up with the biggest migraine after watching this movie. But I will say this though... it is LESS painful than their f*cker-piece, Disaster Movie. Which doesn't mean much. Its like saying "I will only make you bleed out 60% of your blood instead of 100%", you'll still lose blood. It is appreciative that they cut a tiny bit of the pop culture references, but it is still infuriating every time the movie puts one of those. Again there was no f*ckin point, setup or reason every time they bring up something pop culture. Its just f*ckin insulting. The actors are just mimicking the acting style of their characters from the Twilight movies, but for the impersonators who impersonates the celebrities, they did an awful job. Whats worse than Lady Gaga is a crappy Lady Gaga impersonator. The writing is standard Friedberg-Seltzer piss-poor style, considering that it took TWO MONTHS to write a f*ckin script. Wouldn't be surprise if it took them two weeks! Its less crappy though, but its still crap. You know what? Don't bother! This kind of movie is a waste of space and should be completely ignored. I took the bullet to see this to tell you guys and your friends to not see this movie.

GAAAHHH!!!!

Now I'm going into..



(RANT MODE!)



AND you know what is so scary in this day and age? People going to see this more than Scott Pilgrim or The Expendables. That is right, the day where I have been reconfirmed that the majority of young society are run by complete and utter MORONS. And right now, I'm going into a rant... I know YOU people wants some laugh and there is nothing wrong with having a cheap laugh, but if you want some cheap laughs, go to Youtube! F*ckin hell, that is f*ckin FREE and you can find SO MANY Twilight parodies that are MUCH better, rather than paying freakin money to see this crap! If you, like me, hate those Twilight movies, be F*CKIN SMART and don't f*ckin see this movie! In the times where daughters of famous and respectable Hollywood movie stars becomes porn stars because so they can be "famous" (Laurence, I'm sorry, but your daughter is unbelievably retarded... who is kinda hot), it is no wonder society is dumbing down where KIDS don't appreciate the sense of hard work and creativity. Icons like Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton and Michael Bay have gotten where they are by taking the easy way and I'm so pissed off at them because there are creative, talented and hard working people that only gone halfway to where these IDIOTS are. Now you have the generation of young people favoring the lazy and moronic while something that was done with so much hard work, creativity, thought and care like Scott Pilgrim have been thrown aside. If that's what the world is heading, I SO do hope a meteor comes down and destroy the world really early because I wouldn't care anymore. The only reason why I don't feel like having a meteor destroying the world right now is that at least smart and creative films like Toy Story 3 and Inception are performing very well. But if you are one of those people, even IF you're my friend that is keeping the most retarded filmmakers in the film industry by going and giving money to see this pile of crap, then promise me NEVER to have children. Seriously...



In the f*ckin end, I will say: F*CK YOU, JASON FRIEDBERG! F*CK YOU, AARON SELTZER! F*CK THIS MOVIE! F*CK THE PEOPLE WHO LIKED THIS! I WISH I COULD WIPE THAT IMMATURE DOUCHEBAG SMUG OFF YOUR FACE! F*CK YOU JASON AND AARON AND I HOPE YOU DIE!



Ehem... in other words, please don't see this movie...





GTFO out of 5 stars

DIE MUTHERF*CAKAS!!!

My Top Ten: Films That Look Like And Act Like Video Games

Its that time of the month where I give my Top Ten on ANYTHING!

We have seen video-games acting more like theatrical movies nowadays, but were there any movies that act like video-games? Any movies that take on the same mannerism and elements as you would see in a video-game. And I'm not talking about adaptations of a video-game franchise/series, I'm talking about movies that the whole central theme and behavior was video-games. Whenever you see characters using power-ups or that the whole world feels pixely in the movies, you step into the world of videogames You will see what I mean when you read along. I'm listing the ten best films that behave like video-games. Remember: no video-game adaptations like Super Mario Bros. or Prince of Persia.




Lets get on it shall we?

10.
AVATAR



Don’t tell me this film doesn’t look like a video game to you. The graphics and visuals really looks like a Halo game and already puts in the concept of controlling a manufactured body with the same facial features as the controller. Hell the hint was already in the title “Avatar”, the same concept many gamers are into now with World of Warcraft and Nintendo Wii.


9.
DEATH RACE



The original already contains the film’s concept, but the remake really looks more like a video game. It is no surprise since this is directed by Paul W.S Anderson, responsible for video-game adaptations like Mortal Kombat and Resident Evil. So no wonder this is treated like a video game, similar to Twisted Metal. Already you have racers with different abilities and car models and have power-ups or traps on the road that would allow them to use their weapons or have them killed in a horrible and brutal way. As a movie itself, its not bad and it is one of those "turn-your-brain-off-and-enjoy-yourself" mindset when you get into it.

8.
COMMANDO

Hmm, let's see... Schwarzenegger goes into the jungle to face off against a giant military army with only a vest and a mini-gun, as well as having unlimited ammo and picking off one by one without having a single scratch on him... Sounds like a video-game to me. It was

7.
SPEED RACER

This is Mario Kart if Mario was smoking on crack and LSD. I wasn't so sure if I was watching an Anime movie, but I was sure this feels like a video-game. You have bright and colorful characters and their cars with different abilities and weapons, racing through the most ridiculous and ludicrous race tracks to ever be built. Watching this, I really wish I had a controller in my hand. It is, to me, a fun film and I kinda like it. Worthy to be curious and check it out.

6.
GAMER

This film, while having an ambitious intention, tries to make a statement on isolated gaming and technology running your life. It would have been an interesting intellectual film if the story wasn’t that hokey and not frequently filled with breasts and asses. Though the clever thing about it for geek gamers is there are some spots that reference first-person-shooters multiplayer elements such as Halo and Counter-Strike as well as gamer behaviour like the good ol’ Teabagging. Another thing that is satires is the concept of simulation/society games like The Sims, Second Life and IMVU, where players actually controls real humans as their own avatars and they can do whatever they want with them.

5.
BATTLE ROYALE

I have been arguing with myself whether this looks like a video-game or not. Though I have concluded that it may be a video-game movie. These kids are pitted themselves on an Island to kill each other with machine guns till the last one stands. Not to mention they wear a neck bracelet that explodes their heads whenever one of them are in a restricted zone or when the time runs out. I don't know if you people would agree with me, but for now it is. And what a awesome film it is! If people think Kick-Ass is totally controversial, they really haven't see Battle Royale.


4.
CRANK: HIGH VOLTAGE



The first Crank movie was crazy enough, but the sequel to Crank was COMPLETELY straight-up-the-wall insanity. Right from the beginning, you can tell they were so influenced by video-games and designed the character, Chelios as if he was on God-Mode. There are many behaviors of video-games such as pixels and power-ups, but other than that, its a kick-ass movie! If you are that geeky enough, you might reference this from the video-game Infamous, where the character sucks up electricity.

3.
THE MATRIX SERIES

Loading yourself up into a simulated world and hook up with all the power-ups and skills you need = video-games. You won't care so much about the philosophical stuffs this movie is jamming your throat in, you can tell this is the stuffs of video-games. And once again taking the themes of avatars and simulations as well as all the fighting and shooting games we all know of like Max Payne. Now this film series could have gone to greatness if it weren't for the colossal disappointment that was "Revolutions"... sheesh..

2.
TRON

This is the granddaddy of video-game movies. Literally zapped into the digital world full of neon and bits, Tron was filled with so many video-game elements like avatars/representations of their users, geometric-shaped environments and death-match games like holo-disks and the cool light cycles. And even the soundtrack sounds so video-gamey. And even if the movie looks outdated now, it is such a visual-pleasing film to look back on. But I'm excited for the upcoming Tron Legacy. Daft Punk for film score = MOTHAFUCKIN WIN!


And my number 1 is...

1.
SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD

I know this is a very recent film to add in, but this is my list! So bite me. Besides this movie, to me, is the best metaphorical representation of video-games in a movie, merging with real-life situations. This is the BEST video-game movie EVER... yet. Everything about video-games is there: power-ups, exp points, health bars, leveling up, boss battles, pixel graphics and the list goes on! All to narrate a story about a guy dealing with his relationship with his new girlfriend and evaluating his own personal issues. Not to mention the giant dump of video-game references from visuals and sound clips used for sound effects like Sonic and Mario and all of this is done so clever and intelligent. And that is why I considered this the BEST! This is one movie, geek or not, you should not miss!

So that is my top 10 list. What's your opinion?